Totally What I Wanted to Hear!!

When the first words out of a client's mouth are "I don't mean to be a tight wad, but..." it is safe to say you are in trouble.

With my first event, I have learned two things, which I should have known. I will swiftly kick myself in the ass later.

1. Trust no one. Anyone will do or say anything to get what they want. NOT just men that want to get in your pants, I guess.

2. Never, under any circumstances, EVER, do ANY favors. Even if the person is good friends with your uncle. It doesn't matter.

So, when my client (who I didn't trust from the get go) wanted to wait on paying me for everything, I said fine. After all, he is a friend of a friend. Now, I don't care who the hell you are. Favors, in every aspect of my life, are reserved for family and BFF's, and a boyfriend or two.

This "client" is not only shorting me on the HOURS of work I did for him, he is taking the most expensive things and giving me 5% instead of 10%. I drew up a contract in the beginning of this, why did I not give him one? I have no fucking clue. Just wanted to learn, I guess. And I did, believe me, I DID.  The fact is, for all of the consulting with different companies and the birthday boy himself that I did for my $25 per hour consulting fee, I would already have over $500. But nope, I was a good friend to my friend of a friend and didn't charge him for that. Out the fuckin' window that went.

I am going to give everyone I meet a contract from now on. People on the street, people at work. Just so they know, you know. I am being a tad dramatic but this "client" makes me want to give a contract to the cat that is licking herself on my comforter.

I am still getting paid. After trying to inform this client of my around the clock work ethic and all of those hours I spent working on HIS party, and not being one to burn bridges, I finally said "just do what you think is right". There was nothing legally binding him to paying me. What could I do? Go to the police or the better business bureau? Nah. I just made the conscious decision to bite the bullet and let this die. Not worth it for me.

But believe me, everyone and their mother will be getting a contract from me next time. And every fucking time after that.

BTDubs, I brought the rain back to Hell-A with me. Sorry. But even so, today is not going to be a total bust of a day. I swept my hardwood floors, unpacked, wrote a little, and now I am going to take a cat nap, just like the little cat on my belly.

All I Wanted for Christmas.

I got everything!

Family, a purse, friends, a cute fur coat on discount at Kohl's (That Lauren Conrad makes cute stuff, I don't understand why there was a lot left for discount. I guess it is more of an LA style? Who knows.) and a JOB JOB JOB!

Phew. I thought I was going to have to survive on $100 a week. Being that I can't support my left baby fingernail on that amount of money, I am soooo thankful that I have job. 1, 2, 3...breathe. Now, for sure, I will not have to go back to that restaurant again.

2011 is shaping up to be one of those years for the top shelf. 2010 was OK, but I have a (well paying) job, great friends and a much happier disposition this time around. Now maybe I can find myself a suitor so that I won't be the only one at my ten year high school reunion with no boyfriend, no husband and no child. Maybe I could just bring a kid with me if that happens. And then I could use him/her for special events. Especially events I didn't want to go to so I could always use the excuse, "Oh, little Johnny doesn't feel well" or whatever. Anyways, I digress.

The point is, this year will be better than last and maybe, just maybe, since I am
 (as much as I can be) settled enough now in my independence, I can find someone to scoot over on the couch for and maybe share my ice cream with. MAYBE.

ShutUpShutUpShutUp!

For some ungodly reason, I feel old.

These kids who were, last time I checked, 8 year olds when I left town are now drinking booze. And they look like 30 year olds now. I don't know how I recognized any of them. I even ran into people from high school (something I actually love to do whenever I come home), but we all look the same as we did when we were 18 (I was 17, whatever). What the hell is wrong with my hometown? If only my thoughts were real. Like, maybe I could just stay the same and watch everyone else grow up. Grand.


Also, being home, it has occured to me how utterly small this place is. I love it, don't get me wrong. If I could bring a chocolate cow and chicken home to everyone in LA to show my effing Petaluma pride, I would. But this place is small. A "freeway" here is what we would call a busy street in LA. Everyone here knows everyone here (actually that doesn't differ from LA, really), and everyone you see you have probably gone to school with or seen at some lame high school party.

I have been educating myself for the past few days on Chelsea Handler. Educating may not be the right word, but I have been reading her books. I am almost done with My Horizontal Life. Being that I have no horizontal life to speak of, I quite enjoy reading about hers. And being an avid watcher of her show, she writes a lot like I do. I pretty much write how I speak. I actually don't have much else to say right now, except I really hope this pounding head ache goes away. This is how my "walking pneumonia" (so some people say, I just choose not to believe them) started a couple of weeks ago. I lost a bunch of weight, but have since gained most of it back due to my egg nog and alcohol addiction over this fine holiday season.

More tomorrow. Home Wednesday.

Obviously Not

...working.

It's totally fine though. I have a TON of work to do on this party. A down payment would have been nice for my services, but oh well. I will get it in about a month.

Supposedly, I am starting work in January, but who knows? Being dicked around is nothing new for me. I really really really hope it won't come down to that, though. Being that my unemployment only looks at my restaurant earnings at this time, I am only guaranteed $212 per TWO weeks. At least it's something right? And at least I have some moola saved up.

This week is going to be great though, really. I will work on my writing, work on the party, watch movies. Anything that doesn't involve spending massive amounts of money.

Also, I am practicing the art of positive thinking more and more.

This MASSIVE headache I have had swimming through my body all day and as we speak has not slowed me down...yet.

Hey, I said I was practicing. 


<3

Full Time, Bitch!

Cheers to meeeee!

No more restaurant!

Permanent job in the entertainment industry, yay!

I will be starting on Monday as an Executive Assistant to a talent manager and casting director. Gone are my days of answering "I'm a hostess, but a writer" when asked that ever so present Hollywood question of "what do you do?". NOW, I will say, with pride, "I work in talent management" or "I am an executive assistant to a talent manager". Oh, it feels good, it feels reeeeaaaaallll good. Now, I feel like my life can start. AND I DID IT ALL ON MY OWN.

My hairdresser told me today that I must have been pretty "ballsy" to move to Southern California at 18 and never look back. I have thought many things of myself, but "ballsy" was never one of them. Time to think otherwise, I guess! I just always thought the move was so easy, not a big deal, but looking back, I see it as a fearless adventure. And now, I will say it was a "ballsy, fearless adventure". Truth is, I don't remember being scared. Maybe that is because I wasn't.

<3

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Get Ready, Here I Come!

The past five weeks have been quite the whirlwind. BUT, I'm baaaack!

I proudly went back to casting on October 25th, and I must say, I don't remember why I didn't like it so much. It was a fun, pleasant, stressful at times (but what job isn't) and very gratifying. Yes, this is me being positive about something, and no, I am not giving casting up again. The money is good and I feel like now, as opposed to waiting for someone to buy one of my screenplays or waiting to have some man sweep me off of my feet, having a job in the entertainment industry is utterly satisfying. I went to school to be in it, might as well, right?

And this is not to say that my 2 years at the restaurant were a waste. I learned a lot. I became more comfortable in my own skin, more confident. The people I met there pretty much changed my life, and without them I wouldn't feel as confident as I do now.

Even though my casting job has come to an end, (I am getting another one, don't worry, freelance is sometimes the shit, but not if you can't find anything. I always managed to find something rather quickly, though) I am hard at work planning a 30th birthday bash. We are going to the Vanilla Bake Shop today for a consultation. Hopefully when they let us taste the cake, they give us small bites. This holiday season is not being fair to my waistline (or maybe I am not being fair to my waistline by overstocking it with CRAP). I may still look the same to everyone, but as soon as there is a little pooch in my belly (I'm not used to it, okay?) it feels as if I have gained 10 pounds.

You guys would love to tell me to "shut the fuck up", huh? Well, you know what I say? I can't hear you, so by all means, go right ahead.

Time to revise the budget plan for the partay. I honestly can't believe I am up at 9:45 on a Sunday.